Who would you choose?

I’m rewatching Sex and The City for the twentieth time, but I think this time is the first time I’ve ever really paid attention to character development and saw things as an “adult”. When Carrie had an affair with Big while with Aiden, I found myself fuming this time around. ​

​It’s eye opening how we let people of our past come back into our lives so easily when in reality, we shouldn’t be tempted by the idea, especially if they’ve wronged us. Big didn’t choose Carrie. He never truly chose Carrie. I get that sometimes you have feelings for someone that is unlike all the others. That there’s a vibe or a love there that will never be broken, but that feeling allows the past to come back in and hurt us all over again. Why give up current happiness for the chance of rekindling a lost flame? Are we afraid of never being satisfied or are we afraid of settling? I have found myself in this position before and I let him in. Fortunately for me, I wasn’t giving up someone to have him back, but he hurt me all over again and I let him do it without second thought. People don’t change. We are created as we are and that is who we are. If someone lies, they’ll lie again. If someone cheats, they’ll cheat again. The only person we can be accounted for is ourselves. We can fix ourselves but we can’t fix other people. Carrie didn’t care that Big chose Natasha time and time again. Carrie didn’t care that she could’ve settled down and had a beautiful love story with Aiden. (I know their time comes around again,) but for the rest of Aiden’s life, he would have the voice in the back of his head that reminds him that Carrie cheated on him. A lot of people didn’t pick Aiden, but I did and maybe growth means that we see the Aiden’s of the world instead of the Bigs. Or maybe growth is choosing Big because we’re scared of letting him go. Love can do crazy things to sound people. What does love do to you?